jokes..............jokes......................only the best ones

[ameene]

Last winter, the cow caught such a bad cold that she gave ice cream instead of milk


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TEACHER : Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are


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There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn't find hairs on his jackets.
She yelled at him,Great, so now you're cheating on me with a bald woman



The next night, when she didn't smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, She's not only bald, but she's too cheap to buy any perfume


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TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
FRANK : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."


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TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS : Maria


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I snored so much and so loud that I used to wake myself up << a man told his friend.

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One day, a man was riding a horse. He saw a dog on the road.
Good morning, the dog said.
I didn’t know dogs could talk, the man said.
Neither did I, the horse said.

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TEACHER : Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking
when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD : A teacher