How To Build Relationships With Others? 0

[أم بدر الدين]

How To Build Relationships With Others?
From the most important principles that should be followed when building relationships with people are:

Correct the relationship between yourself and Allah and Allah will then correct the relationship between yourself and others.
Studies have proved that every individual has his own unique pattern of understanding and that patterns are usually one of the following:


A visual pattern, i.e. one looks at the world and deals with it from a physical point of view.
A hearing pattern, i.e. one looks at the world and deals with it based on the words that one hears (one better understands by hearing).
An emotion-based pattern, i.e. one looks at the world through one's emotions and inner feelings.
If you succeed in understanding how a particular individual perceives things (i.e., which pattern one emphasizes), then you can more easily achieve harmony and understanding between the two of you, as well as achieve confidence in your relationship.


Put yourself in the place of others and let them hear from you what you like to hear from them, and behave with them the way you like them to behave with you.
Always keep smiling, especially during difficult situations and incidents.
Keep your calm and self control when provoked.
Always be sensitive to feelings of others, their rights and their needs.
Choose your words carefully, especially during the first encounter. Be cheerful when speaking and beware of dull facial expressions and tough looks even if your words are very nice.
When the atmosphere is not appropriate to talk about a particular subject, then it is better to end the talk about that subject in a courteous way and postpone it to a more appropriate time.


Decorate your talk with jokes and proverbs without making this overwhelming in your talk, and tell only the truth. This will induce an interactive discussion.

Give away gifts even if small ones and rush to help others even if in little ways, because these are means of winning hearts and of building relationships. It is related in Adab al-Mufrad of Al-Bukhari that the Prophet (may peace and blessing be upon him) said: "Give gifts as it will create love amongst you."
Spread Salam (Islamic greeting) and reply to a greeting with a better one. This is a key to winning others' hearts, so be eager to own this key.

Keep your promises and be truthful in your talk. This will make others love you even when you cannot accomplish what they want.
Be generous within your means. Even whatever little that you may give will put you in a high position in the hearts of people. No one can win the hearts of others while he is described as stingy and not generous.

Be simple and spontaneous in dealing with others. Being organized in your life will make you win others' respect, even that of your enemies.
Be clean in your body, mouth and clothing, be stylish without exaggeration, and put on a nice fragrance; all these will make others that are dealing with you more comfortable, instead of making them avoid you.
These principles can be applied under all circumstances and in all roles - at work, at home, with our husband or our wife, our father, our sons, our friends, or with strangers.

[micha443]

thanks my darling for the subject
i think that building good relationships is the Key of our personal Success

[hairless17]

Great , Malika
You are telling us some of your wisdom
Thnks

[أم بدر الدين]

You are all welcome ;;thanx hairless

[hairless17]

Is a relationship permanent ?1

[أم بدر الدين]

The relationship must be everlasting


Relationship is a two way traffic, it is often said that it take two to make things go right, that saying is particularly true when it comes to
relationship. Putting the knowledge of 8 Pillars of everlasting relationship to work will without fail benefit you and your partner for an everlasting enjoyable relationship. Here are the pillars of everlasting relationship:

(1). Communication

Virtually every aspect of a relationship is touched by communication. It is of great importance to know how to communicate well and effectively. Every expression makes and impression. Positive comments help to keep relationship alive while negative comments drags relationship to the ground.

(2). Respect
This means accepting and loving your partner for the wonderful, unique human being they are. Respect who they are and don't try to make them be like you, understand that the ways that they differ from you don't need to be fixed. Your partner isn't your private property, it isn't conducive to a happy relationship to restrict their freedoms by treating them this way. Instead it is far better to encourage your partner to grow and become the person they want to be.

(3). Honesty
In a relationship, complete honesty is always needed. The principle behind it is that no one likes being lied to, and if a relationship is to flourish, it should be built on the foundation of honesty. This includes honesty to oneself, if you aren't honest to yourself how can you possibly be honest to your partner.

(4). Trust
Trust is creating a safe emotional space for your partner. Trust is something that can be cultivated and nurtured, one should continuously and actively work on building a safe emotional space. Your partner should be able to trust you completely with everything from the smallest detail up to and including trusting you with their life.

(5). Commitment
Commitment means being prepared to accept disappointments that can occur in a relationship, and finding an honest way to work it out. Those who become serious in a relationship without preparing for any problems, disappointments, or adjustments can experience increased insecurities or resentments that can affect the overall health of their relationship.

(6). Compromise
The single worst way to spoil your relationship is to be argumentative because you want to be right. This is DEADLY. Argumentative people will argue until they win. They will not listen and consider their partner's viewpoints and will rarely if ever compromise. Try not to get into silly, futile arguments and remember that winning arguments isn't the objective, but what is best for your relationship.

(7). Attention
Attention is placing importance to something or someone in your life. Keeping the spark alive in a relationship is something many couples fail to do. *******ment sets in, you start to take your partner for granted and gradually, the spark fades and dies. It's so easy to fall into the *******ment trap and the result is you stop making an effort for your partner

(8). Intimacy
This refers to every thing intimate including letting down your security walls you have inside of you and letting your partner deeper than the surface level that you keep up to protect yourself from being hurt.

Practice these pillars of everlasting relationship and you will without fail see the benefits.

[hairless17]

Where are our relations now from this ?0

[أم بدر الدين]

We do our best to be honest in our relations with the others;i don't mind if they are so..
My aim is starting by myself and my small family and if everyone does the same thing all the good things will come back

[hairless17]

surely sister

[أم بدر الدين]

Thank you brother

[hairless17]

You are welcome

[أم بدر الدين]

Do you think that you have really succeeded in making a good relatonship with the others? 0

[hairless17]

As I know I did in 80%

[أم بدر الدين]

Great , you really succeed

[hairless17]

I am very proud to hear that

[أم بدر الدين]

It's the reality;welcome

[hairless17]

Should we deal with all people at the same way ?0

[أم بدر الدين]

Surely no...There is a type of people to whom you should never talk ...and the other people you behave with them depending on their education;thoughts; as well as their vision to life and relationship with the others

[hairless17]

Thanks wise

[أم بدر الدين]

You are most welcome

[hairless17]

Here you are back !0

[أم بدر الدين]

Thank you ..my life is really in this forum

[hairless17]

And I am very glad to hear that

[أم بدر الدين]

You are welcome

[hairless17]

Is confidence important in building relations ?0

[أم بدر الدين]

Sure confidence is the main thing that comes before building any relation starting by people then families then countries ....
without confidence there is no trust nor respect

[hairless17]

A good addition thanks

[أم بدر الدين]

Thank you for your comment

[hairless17]

Do the relations succeed with the absence of sincerety and trust ?.0

[أم بدر الدين]

this kind of relation succed with dishonest persons sincerety and trust are the major elements that reenforce any relation

[hairless17]

Thanks sister
Where are the others ?0

[أم بدر الدين]

I see that you are angry 'cause the members don't participate in the discussion

[hairless17]

No I am not angry I only miss their presence

[أم بدر الدين]

Yes you are right indeed

[hairless17]

Thanks for the suupport

[عبدالرحمن1]

thanks my sister
god save you

[hairless17]

Thanks Abdou for passing

[أم بدر الدين]

You are welcome

[hairless17]

What makes relaions fail ?0

[أم بدر الدين]

The first thing is the absence of trust and respect

http://www.classyflowers.co.uk/images/thank-you-balloons.jpg

[hairless17]

Wht is the 2nd

[أم بدر الدين]

Second other things such as jealousy , selfishness, envy.... 0

[hairless17]

Why do some realations fail even the two persons are sincere ?0

[أم بدر الدين]

It happens but there must be something wrong in their relation

[hairless17]

May be ....

[أم بدر الدين]

No sure if any relation fails this means that someting is wrong somewhere

[hairless17]

But sometimes there are external causes

[أم بدر الدين]

Yes this what i meant that every thing happens for a reason and with a reason

[hairless17]

We returned to your rule
Thanks

[أم بدر الدين]

And you are welcome

[hairless17]

So we have to look for the reason

[أم بدر الدين]

Reasons are endless but the only thing is that if you deeply want to keep this relation nothing can disturb it 'cause it is you right to protect your life from any wind that can hurt this relation

[hairless17]

Thanks sister

[أم بدر الدين]

You are welcome

[hairless17]

Can we classify relations ?0

[أم بدر الدين]

Perhaps but i will do it tomorrow; i am so tired

[hairless17]

God help you

[أم بدر الدين]

But what do you mean by classification here? 0

[hairless17]

I meant kinds

[أم بدر الدين]

I think that it is so difficult to put this classification
God bless you

[hairless17]

Why is it so difficult

[أم بدر الدين]

The kinds of relationships,this seems to be a strange clssification
If you can do it for us
Thanx

[hairless17]

I will try to make a little search

[hairless17]

Types of social relations

In broad terms, we can distinguish six basic levels of human awareness:
unconscious awareness (studied by e.g. Sigmund Freud, Carl Jung, and Milton Erickson).
conscious subjective awareness (dissociated, focusing inward on the inner world, or expressing an inner state outwards) (studied e.g. in phenomenology and general psychology).
intersubjective awareness (an awareness which occurs in association with other people and is internal to that association) (studied e.g. in social psychology and sociology).
objective awareness (dissociated, focusing outward to a world that exists mind-independently, as is developed e.g. in science to a high level).
reality-transforming awareness (transitions in practical action reframing the boundaries of different forms of awareness and changing consciousness, or connecting different forms of awareness - occurring in work, play, love, activism, politics etc.
transcendent awareness (going beyond personal knowledge or experience - some would include intuition and spirituality under this heading; it is the subject of much writing in religion and New Age thought).

Corresponding to these levels of human awareness, we could also define different kinds of social relations; i.e., the different ways in which humans might experience the connections among their own kind:
subconscious social relations (for example at the level of the collective unconscious or between parents and children,
social relations which exist only in subjective awareness or subjective perceptions (a person might act as though a social relation exists),
intersubjective social relations involving shared meanings conveyed through communication,
objective social relations which exist whether someone is aware of them or not (they might nevertheless be communicated insofar as we communicate with everything we are and do);
social relations in the process of being transformed from one kind into another, or being interrelated with each other;
spiritual or intuitive social relations of some kind.

As illustration, we can apply the foregoing to the notion of a group.
A person might almost out of instinct identify with a group or relate to it;
s/he might imagine being a member of a group, regardless of whether this is really the case;
a group might exist only in the form of intersubjective relations among its members;
a group might exist as an objective description, or as an objective reality, even regardless of whether one was aware of belonging to it;
a group might be forming or dissolving, or both at once, and it might be changing its boundaries of inclusion and exclusion, perhaps overlapping with other groups;
a group might also exist at the level of a common spiritual affinity or identification (Cf. the notion of a noosphere).

However the group may exist, or be perceived to exist at some level - with the obvious consequences that has for the kinds of social relations involved - it is clear that understanding different kinds of group relations require different methods of inquiry and verification.

Precisely because social relations may be experienced at different levels of awareness, they are not necessarily transparent at all. Indeed, Karl Marx wrote ironically in this respect that "science would be superfluous if the outward appearance and the essence of things directly coincided
."

From Wikepedia

[أم بدر الدين]

http://www.filebuzz.com/software_screenshot/full/26565-detective_words.jpg

God bless you

[conqueror]

Life is beautifull with good friends ...

[hairless17]

Thanks for all

[أم بدر الدين]

God bless you
You are really welcome