Written Expression

[younes01]

السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته
في سعينا لتطوير ماهراتنا في تحرير الفقرات في اللغات الاجنبية ( معضلة التلاميذ ) سيتم كل يوم طرح طلب تحرير لفقرة بالتناوب حيث يوم للانجليزية ويوم للفرنسية وهذا سعيا منا لتبادل امثل للافكار و تطوير القدرات التحريرية للتلميذ
تم بحمد لله وضع فقرة بالفرنسية امس اما اليوم فهو الدور على الانجليزية ، فقط من يرى اخطاء في فقرة اخيه فليصححها ويعطيه تقييمه لها وايضا يعطيه نصائح او ملاحظات ان وجدها

Millions of children are engaged in hazardous situations or conditions , such as working in mines , working with chemicals and pesticides in agriculture or working with dangerous machinery

Write a composition stating your opinion and the measures that should be taken to reduce or stop this kind of abuse

[younes01]

i will back latter with my essay

[طيور السلام]

thank you very much my brather
جاري المحاولة

[younes01]

You are welcome brother

[theorthopidique]

good morning evry bady i will try to write a paragraphe but i am busy this day but i will write it if god want we must do no thing thins day just english becouse all the student must do this ex in order to devolope thier leavel in english good like

[younes01]

good morning evry bady i will try to write a paragraphe but i am busy this day but i will write it if god want we must do no thing thins day just english becouse all the student must do this ex in order to devolope thier leavel in english good like

good morning every body i will try to write a paragraph but i am busy this day but i will write it if god want , we must do no thing this day just English because all the student must do this ex in order to develop our level in English good luck

[theorthopidique]

good morning every body i will try to write a paragraph but i am busy this day but i will write it if god want , we must do no thing this day just English because all the student must do this ex in order to develop our level in English good luck
thanx ans sorrrrrrrrry about the maestackes i write quickly for that i do lot of maestacks i want some one to learn me how we write i cant put a distance in the biging of the paraghraph can u help me please?

[younes01]

just use ( enter ) many time to make a large distance between the words

[younes01]

In many parts of the world , Millions of children are engaged in hazardous situations or conditions , such as working in mines , working with chemicals and pesticides in agriculture or working with dangerous machinery
The exploitation , deprivation , humiliation , illiteracy , violence, and bad conditions ; this is the words that can explain the situation of this kind of children , this features obligate us beg this question : how long the humanity see this images ? and what we should to do ?
We must reduce and stop this abuse , the organizations like UNICEF should be more interactive , communities must be put a strict rules which can stop the responsible of this sorts of exploitation and inhuman abuse .
The authorities must ban the child who have less than sixteen from work in any situation and try to keep the rights of this children in education , living in appropriate conditions , health and eat , welfare and comfort , to re sum living like all other children
finally , this kind of abuse must be stopped because any human in this life have the right to live in the best situations for looking to best future of them .

[younes01]

i wish that you correct my faults and don't forget the evaluation ( x /5 pts )
i'm waiting for yours essay

[وفـــــاء]

thank you brother
allah pless you

[younes01]

Silent__fire
try to write a parapgraph

[achour idoughi]

The exploitation , deprivation , humiliation , illiteracy , violence, and bad conditions ; these are the words that can explain the situation of this kind of children , these features obligate us beg this question : how long does the humanity see these images ? and what we should to do ?
We must reduce and stop this abuse , the organizations like UNICEF should be more interactive , communities must be* put a strict rules which can stop the responsible of these sorts of exploitation and inhuman abuse .
The authorities must ban the child who have less than sixteen from work in any situation and try to keep the rights of these children in education , living in appropriate conditions , health and eat , welfare and comfort , to re sum living like all other children
finally , this kind of abuse must be stopped because any human in this life has the right to live in the* best situations for looking to best future of them

good written but try to avoid the mistake

[الهام الحياة]

good
i'm busy right now
tomorrow inchalah i 'll try

[الفلاح المحترف]

l will try

[silver3100]

In many parts of the world , Millions of children are engaged in hazardous situations or conditions , such as working in mines , working with chemicals and pesticides in agriculture or working with dangerous machinery
The exploitation , deprivation , humiliation , illiteracy , violence, and bad conditions ; this is the words that can explain the situation of this kind of children , this features obligate us beg this question : how long the humanity see this images ? and what we should to do ?
We must reduce and stop this abuse , the organizations like UNICEF should be more interactive , communities must be put a strict rules which can stop the responsible of this sorts of exploitation and inhuman abuse .
The authorities must ban the child who have less than sixteen from work in any situation and try to keep the rights of this children in education , living in appropriate conditions , health and eat , welfare and comfort , to re sum living like all other children
finally , this kind of abuse must be stopped because any human in this life have the right to live in the best situations for looking to best future of them .



good work but i have read something like that before

i thing it's in this link




http://www.unicef.org/protection/index_childlabour.html

[younes01]

مشكور اخوي achour idoughi
لم انتبه لكلمة these
يووجد خطا آخر بسيط لم انتبه له هو to beg
☺

[younes01]

soumia you mean that it's not my ideas !!!!
i never see a paragraph about child labour
this written expression it was done in the last bac in english

we want your attempt

[silver3100]

h did not say anything about
but yes i will try

[achour idoughi]

tomorrow or this night i'll give show you my attempt

[achour idoughi]

without give)

[younes01]

brothers and sister where is the pursuit to the best !
where is the perseverance !!!
where is yours attempts !!

[الهام الحياة]

brothers and sister where is the pursuit to the best !
where is the perseverance !!!
where is yours attempts !!

just wait for tomorrow :19::19::19::19:

[younes01]

ok we are under waiting
:)

[الجوهرة السوداء]

thank's brother...
we will see what we can do...

[واقعية]

thanQ brother for this idea, I'll benefit inchaalla since I'm bad in French and English writing
I'm going to try to make an essay and post it here

* I suggest to prolong the duration for writing,
it might be one per two days so we can arrange an hour for it and make it as good as possible
because I'm following your daily lessons in the other subjects, and plus I'm pretty busy with my self-learning lessons

hope you think about that again

I thank you again, and wish that we'll improve our redactions fastly

[younes01]

waikia
action-ally we do the written expression day by day ; do for the english and day foe the french
:)

[achour idoughi]

who among us doesn't want to become a child another time? But do you know why?! Because childhood is the only period of time in which there is no problem or dellema, we doesn't feel axious at all.
A child is always playing and enjoying his time in this period..
Unfotunately, this is not the case for all the children around the world.
children are suffering more and more especially those of poor contries from various exploitations. These latters ,I mean children, are engaged in unsafe conditions. They are obliged to work days and nights to meet the needs of their families
Their bosses exploit them in hard and dangerous labours..
moreover, they haven't even insurance. What a shame!!
It is time to react so that our children live a life which is full of love and security.
Many organization should be created to make end to this pure exploitation.
gouvernements must forbid and ban such action by setting up rules. in addition to this, they have to eliminate poverty .
Our chimdren are our tomorrow , hence we have to protecte them because protecting them means preserving the future generations

[achour idoughi]

where are your answers

[younes01]

achour idoughi i will back and read your essay later ( after a hour )

[achour idoughi]

ok just exuse me for the mistakes of tape

[younes01]

who among us doesn't want to become a child another time? But do you know why?! Because childhood is the only period of time in which there is no problems or dellema,!!!!! we don't feel anxious at all.
A child is always playing and enjoying his time in this period..
Unfortunately, this is not the case for all the children around the world.
children are suffering more and more especially those of poor countries from various exploitations. Those latterr,I mean children, are engaged in unsafe conditions. They are obliged to work days and nights to meet the needs of their families
Their bosses exploit them in hard and dangerous labours..
moreover, they haven't even insurance. What a shame!!
It is time to react so that our children live a life which is full of love and security.
Many organization should be created to make end to this pure!!!!!! exploitation.
governments must forbid and ban such action by setting up rules. in addition to this, they have to eliminate poverty .
Our children are us tomorrow , hence we have to protect them because protecting them means preserving the future of generations

good writing but you must care about the orthographic faults , i wish that i made not a mistakes in correction
i give you 5.5/8

[عبد اللطيفْ]

c'est bien
! apprenez-moi l'Anglais si vous voulez bien

[silver3100]

c'est bien
! apprenez-moi l'Anglais si vous voulez bien



mais
mais tu est fort en anglais

[عبد اللطيفْ]

mais
mais tu est fort en anglais

pas trop fort comme mes chers amis
^^

[roseikram]

شكرااااااااااااااااااااااا or thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

[silver3100]

pas trop fort comme mes chers amis
^^

ok
et en français aussi tu n'est pas fort comme eux ^^ XD

[عبد اللطيفْ]

ok
et en français aussi tu n'est pas fort comme eux ^^ XD


tu as tout compris loOl

[silver3100]

tu as tout compris loOl



oui moi je comprend tous
ok
LOol

[عبد اللطيفْ]

oui moi je comprend tous
ok
LOol

loOl
wellah c'est vrai, bon courage
j'espère te connaitre à la faculté de medecine

[achour idoughi]

i did it to my mother who is teacher of english and she gave me 4/5

[roseikram]

شكراااااااااااااااااااااااااااااااااااااا

[younes01]

idoughi
you did a lot of mistakes and you wrote a words i search for it and i couldn't find it
and i think you had 3.5/5
your mamy give you 4/5 because your are her child and in order to encourage you
:)

[achour idoughi]

i told you that the mistakes i did are ones of taping

[Nour el houda93]

think you verry much my sister

continue

[younes01]

you haven't just mistakes in orthography

i told you that the mistakes i did are ones of taping
here we say
i told you that the mistakes that i did it are ones of taping

[achour idoughi]

you are too Tenacious
you are weak in english admiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit

[younes01]

bro we are here to learn
i will give 5/5 , are you confrontable now !!!
i dare you فخ take 3.5/5 in the bac in written expression
hhhhh you know !! my mom give me 100/10 hhhh

[achour idoughi]

i have a trust on me
that's the most important


تم التعديل على المشاركة ...يرجى مرعاة الإحترام مع الآخرين

[younes01]

الله يهديك اخوي ، آه على الاسلام ؟ اعطيك 5.5/8 ةذوامك تعطيك 4/5 فتغضب ؟؟ وفوق ذلك تهينني
اخوي انا اعذرك لانك من مواليد 1993 ومازلت لم تتعلم الكثير والحمد لله ان جميع مواليد 1993 ليسوا مثلك
واتمنى ان تصحح فقرتك في الباكالوريا امك حتى تتعاطف معك وتعطيك 5/5
الله يوفقك وبخصوص مشاركتك جاري الشكوى للادارة .

[achour idoughi]

sans commentaires

[theorthopidique]

idoughi
you did a lot of mistakes and you wrote a words i search for it and i couldn't find it
and i think you had 3.5/5
your mamy give you 4/5 because your are her child and in order to encourage you
:)
ماش مهم اخ الياس الخطىء في الكتابة المهم تكون الفكرة وصلت علابالك عليها غير0.75 الكتابة في الفرنسية والانجليزية

[أَبُو رَُئَيـــــــــــــــــــــــْمْ]

i will try